Heal a Hurting Heart post traumatic childrens story book for children experiencing natural disaster

The adults were talking about some Tropical Cyclone called Idai. I have a friend at school whose name is Idai, she said her name meant 'love' surely this Cyclone was nothing to love! Some said the storm would miss us and others said that we needed to pray hard. Aunty Leila said she heard that people in another country had to stay safe in a storm last week by sitting in a tub. We did not have a tub just a shower outside!

I wondered where my Dad was. He did not live with us or even in our village. He worked in the cotton fields and cutting sugar cane. I did see him though, as he would bring bags of food for my Mum. He would sometimes talk to me on her phone. Even thought dad is not here I know I am important to my mum and dad. Mum was always telling me "Adil you are a special boy"

The sky was getting darker even though it was only five o'clock. One of the men from the Village Council came by and said that we should have cut the tree outside but it was too late. He asked if we had food and reminded us to charge our phones and fill buckets as the light and water would probably be cut off in the storm. He showed me a picture on his phone of a map with a big red and yellow blob with a white dot in the middle. He said that was " the eye of the storm"

It looked like a dragon’s eye and it made me a bit nervous and I got frightened, it was like a monster that was going to gobble me up, I wanted to hide, I had to get Puppy from outside.

Uncle Camilo got a message on his phone from a friend in America to say the storm was Category 4 and coming right for us and it was the strongest ever!!!! Water started coming under the door and something hit the window and broke it. Uncle Camilo taped a cushion over it. Mummy and Aunty Leila were trying to mop up water with old towels. I was holding the puppy, who had started to shiver, and hoping no one noticed she was inside.

Suddenly there was a huge crash and the door broke and the Wind came inside and so did a lot of dirty water and we realized that the river next to the house was overflowing. We all backed into the bedroom where Granny was on the bed. Uncle Camilo put my mattress over her. The noise was terrifying with the crashing of falling trees and buildings and thunder rolling. We could hear the neighbors screaming. We slammed the bedroom door and put a chair under the handle. Then we all hid in the closet, even Puppy . We were squashed together in the closet except for Granny who was still under the mattress..... the water was coming in under the door........then suddenly it was quiet.

Uncle Camilo said this was the "Eye" that the Village Council man had talked about. We came out of the closet and could see the sky where the ceiling should have been. Uncle Camilo said "Come on, we will have to go to the Shelter." He pushed open the front door and there was a lot of water. The river was where the road should have been. He told me "Go Go Go!" He and Mummy went back in the bedroom for Granny. Aunty Leila was crying and saying she did not want to leave the house. I found my coat and put it on pulling the hood up tight.

I held on to P uppy and stepped into the water. We had to get to the Primary school. The wind was quiet and the air strangely still.

Even though I walked on the side of the road the water was up to my knees. Aunty Leila was holding Uncle Camilo's phone shining a light at me. Mummy and Uncle Camilo were following, carrying Granny at least I thought they were.....

Then the wind got angry again and the water was up to my waist. I held the puppy inside my coat. The light went out and something hit my legs under the water. I fell over and felt myself being sucked away by the water...... my head banged into something. P uppy put her foot in my mouth, that's all I remember!

Mud - mud, mud, mud everywhere. You could not see the road because of the mud. I had a big lump on my head. And where was my puppy ? I called her and looked and looked. People were standing in the street just looking. Cars were smashed and crushed. Electricity poles were down and wires everywhere. I could not understand how I had got to the Bay. Our house was much further up the ravine. I thought I saw my puppy down by the sea and I went to look, but it was a bigger dog.

Whilst I was there on the stony beach, a policeman in army uniform called to me. I asked him if he had seen my puppy . The Policeman took me to the Shelter and I expected to see my mother, Aunty Leila, Uncle Camilo and Granny. He gave me to the nurse instead. She touched my head and said I had to go to the Hospital in Town. I thought maybe my mother was hurt and so I was going to see her. People were just sitting and staring. One lady was bawling a lot. I heard someone say she had lost her baby that seemed careless. I thought someone should help her look for it. The Policeman said we would have to go to the hospital by boat. Someone gave me a Bolo Polana and I was very grateful because my tummy was rumbling .

On the way back to the bay we went past a crushed car and I heard a whimper. I saw a tail. I told the Policeman "stop, stop please I see puppy" I looked under the car and there was Puppy wet and muddy but there......

I picked her up and hugged her tight. The Policeman said Puppy could come too, at last something good had happened. The Policeman told me I was a champion and not to focus on what I had been through I was to focus on where I was going in life - where ever that was - the Hospital right now!

It was quite a long walk up a steep hill and there was lots of mud and a funny smell. The river was very full. I saw a helicopter coming over my head with a flag underneath. The Policeman said it was the United Nations flag and that it was stuck under the helicopter was so people would know who was helping. There was galvanized roof sheets everywhere from the roofs and cars were blocking the road sitting where the river had put them. Some people seemed to be carrying a lot of shopping which was odd as the shops were mostly broken.

When we got to the hospital there was a skinny nurse who was vexed and said that Puppy could not come inside Casualty! I was tired and sad. I wanted to see my Mummy and my Aunty and my Granny and Uncle Camilo! I said I did not want to stay there. The Policeman said it was OK and that he would hold Puppy for me whilst I went in with the Nurse. I thought I was going to see my family, I looked in the room but there was just a little girl crying, an old man who was very still and a very pregnant lady moaning. There was a young boy like me with blood running down his leg into the water on the floor making a horrible mess. The nurse took my temperature, s he said I had to see a doctor.

The doctor looked very tired. She said she had been there for 24 hours, all the way through the storm, but no one had come to relieve her. She said that I had a "con cushion" or at least that is what it sounded like. She said I should go home and rest. I told her our home was gone and I did not know where my family members were. She called the policeman in and Puppy peed on the floor. You can imagine the nurse was not happy!

Whilst the nurse was shouting and getting a lady to come with a mop the police whispered in the Doctors ear. Then the Doctor told me to go and sit outside on the chairs with Puppy . After a long time when the Policeman came back with a bottle of Fanta for me and a Sandes de Queijo . He told me that I was going on a big adventure. He also told me that they were looking for my Mum and Uncle Camilo and Aunty Leila and that very sadly they had found my Granny and she was not alive any more. He told me that I had to go to a nice Big House and wait to see what would happen. I was worried in case the people at the Big House would not like dogs. I began to cry I thought I might lose Puppy and I would be so lonely. I did not really understand what he said about Granny, how could she not be alive any more, I was confused.

The Policeman told me that he would tell them at the Big House that Puppy had to come as well.

We went to the savannah in front of the hospital and there was a helicopter already there. The blades on top the helicopter were spinning like a fan and it was very loud. The dust and leaves were blowing at me like the hurricane wind all over again. The policeman did me high five and gave me to a big soldier who made me do up my coat and put a helmet on me. He put ear plugs in my ears and a sort of life jacket on me.

Two soldiers pushed me up some big steps into the helicopter. I looked back and waved to the Policeman. Then they strapped me into a seat and they told me to hold Puppy tight. A lady soldier told me this was a Wild Cat Helicopter. She was funny and blocked Puppy 's ears when she said "Wild cat" as she said dogs like to chase cats! She had a red cross on her shoulder and she said she was a nurse as well as a soldier. She said they were just giving me a ride to the Children's Home as the bridge on the way was gone and there was lots of rubbish blocking the road. I asked if my Mum would be there but it was too noisy I could not understand her answer.

When the helicopter landed, they undid all the straps and took off the lifejacket and I got out still clutching Puppy . It was further than I thought and I fell down. I felt stupid as there were loads of children watching from the steps of the big house. They seemed disappointed that it was just me and Puppy, until behind me the soldiers brought out bottles of water and boxes of biscuits. "Come on Boy" said a Lady in an orange T shirt, "come away from that helicopter." She took me into the kitchen with P uppy and I heard the helicopter flying away. I never got to say goodbye to the nice Nurse Soldier Lady.

The Home was huge. There were lots of bedrooms for boys downstairs and upstairs there were lots more for girls.

The roof had come off a bit so the girls were all in just two of the rooms, and there were piles of wet clothes everywhere. There was a very big dining room and kitchen. I was in a room with three other boys and I had my own bed. The home had a generator that was noisy but it was nice to have light. There was no TV or Internet as the Storm had messed up everything. To save gas they just put the generator on from 6.00 -8.00pm then we went to bed and used flash lights.

The Lady in the orange T Shirt was called Miss Gizela, she said Puppy had to live in the dog house under the building but that I could see her when I wanted. She gave me to a man called Mr. Hamza also in an orange T Shirt and he showed me where Puppy would stay. He even had dog food for her. He said their dog had got lost in the storm. No one knew about my Mum and Aunty and Uncle Camilo. I told them the Police said Granny had died but they were looking for the others. Another younger staff member said she heard they were all washed away and said "accept her sympathy, the Lord is with you boy, all these things will make you strong" I thought that must be a mistake and at that moment I felt rather weak not at all strong. I asked for my Dad but they said they heard that they were all gone. I did not think that could be right.

She said she ran straight away and told Miss Gizela what he tried to do and the police came and took him away. She said Mr. Hamza was in the prison waiting for the court to decide on his punishment. I was so mad! How could he say he would hurt Puppy ! I was pleased he had left as I felt like doing him something.

Hanifa said she knew what to do about Mr. Hamza's bad intentions towards her as it was not the first time. She said her mother's boyfriend had done something wrong to her before and she had told her Sunday School Teacher. She said that is why she was in the Home. As her mother did not believe her but the Sunday School teacher did. She said the Sunday school teacher told her to "tell the truth and truth would set her free" and that she had prayed with her, then she got brave and when the Police came with the Welfare officer she told them all about it and they were sorting it all out.

Hanifa said she knew that you should always run from people with bad intentions and tell someone. She said she knew now that some bad secrets should not be kept. She explained that "Good secrets" were like not telling about a surprise party or what was in a present. But "Bad secrets" were those where the person threatens you if you tell what they did and where they touch you. No one except your mum or the nurse should touch you where your underwear goes and then tell you not to tell anyone that is a bad secret to keep.

Hanifa said that after that experience with her mother's boyfriend she had been different. She said her Sunday School Teacher had told her that God loved her and that it was not her fault. She said she had decided to serve Christ. I did not know what she meant but I did know I was pleased Mr. Hamza was gone.

They made us walk about a mile as the bus had been crushed by a tree falling on it. School was weird, no uniforms, no books, and , because the galvanized roof sheets had blown off, we were in a tent. Tents are funny things. When the sun comes out they are hot, hot, hot and you have to roll up the sides. When it rains and some of the children cry because they think the storm is coming back, then you have to let the sides down again and be hot and sweaty again. Our tent had UNICEF written on it which meant that nice people from overseas sent it.

In the afternoon foreign workers came in blue T shirts they said they were our friends and they set up something called a Child Friendly Space where we played games. Their names were funny and if you did learn them then they left for good! So in the end we just called them "Miss" and "Sir"

I did not have any friends in the Home except one girl who was called Hanifa. She was 12 and was already at Secondary School so she did not come with me to the Tent School. She had lived in that Home for months before the Storm. She would sit with me under the house and pet Puppy and talk to me. I told her that I did not believe that my Mum and Aunt and Granny and Uncle Camilo could all be dead. Granny was old so I could believe that she had not made it but not the others. I had dreams that Mummy was calling me, and when the wind blew and it rained I dreamed I was under the car in mud.

The other children all seemed to know each other and the three in my room were all from the same village. They called me Helicopter Boy and would make helicopter noises every time I came in. One big boy said that he hated people from my village and that he would poison my dog as she wasn't a fierce breed like the Boerboel , or the South African Mastiff . He loved Boerboel s and so, after a while, that is what we called him, even the staff. "Boer" became his name. Everyone would have a job in the Home, Boer's was to take out the garbage to the bins. He always made me do it so that he would not hurt Puppy . He said he would tie a block round her neck and throw her in the river. Sometimes I was very sad and lonely I would hide and cry quietly hugging Puppy who was my only comfort.

Another problem was Mr. Hamza. He always looked at me as if I was in the way and said I should not hug Puppy as I would get 'Leap To Spring Osis'! And he told Hanifa to stay away from me. I began to avoid him. Then one Monday he just did not come to work any longer!

I could not sleep properly in a nice bed as the storm kept troubling me in my dreams and I kept crying for my mum. She told us that Jesus had a special power not to be afraid and not to hate people who hurt him. She told us that because Jesus loved us he died on the cross and wanted to help us to be friends with God and have power not to be afraid and not to hate people. She said we had to decide whether to follow Jesus or go our own way. She said the way to become a Christian was to Repent and Believe.

I thought this sounded interesting I have always wanted special powers!!! Also I was very troubled about how much I hated Boer and Mr. Hamza too!

I knew God had saved my life and I really needed to be able to sleep in the storm. I decided to give my life to Christ and to be a Christian. I am not a great reader but the Bible Books had loads of pictures and the Sunday School Teacher said that God loved everyone whether they were top or bottom of the class, good or bad, pretty or ugly, that Jesus still died for them so they could "tell the truth and the truth would set them free"

Boer somehow heard that I had put my hand up when the Sunday School Teacher prayed. He straight away said I was a Bible bashing Christian. He said Christians were selfish, only helped their own church people and taking people's money. He said he would kill Puppy then I could pray for him to be raised from the dead. I felt myself getting red I just wanted to punch Boer on the nose! That night I remember the boys in my room were especially tormenting with their helicopter noises and saying that nobody wanted to be friends with Helicopter Boy.

I pulled the sheet over my head and asked God to switch on those magic powers as right now all I could think about was all the bad things I wanted to do to those guys. I felt so alone but somehow I knew I had a best friend and His name was Jesus. It started to rain and the boys started to cry but I went sound asleep even though I still had a horrible dream, which made me feel bad the next day I felt so lost and lonely all I really had to call my own was Puppy.

A caterpillar is a worm -- and worms are not beautiful! In fact the only good thing about worms was that you could put them on a hook and go fishing. Jasmine squirmed when I told her my fishing stories, with wriggling worms.

But then I learnt in Sunday School that one day the caterpillar spun a cocoon about himself and stays there for several weeks. Just hanging upside down, occasionally twitching, who would imagine that anything good was happening. But it was like the caterpillar was being born again and when it comes out, it is no longer a caterpillar, it has been miraculously changed into a beautiful butterfly, it was a new creation.

But it took time, it was like the caterpillar died in the chrysalis or cocoon and eventually the butterfly emerged but it was a struggle.

One day Puppy and I were in the field next to the Children's Home and we saw a chrysalis hanging from a twig, it started twitching and cracking open. We watched as the butterfly struggled to get out. It made me think of all the struggling I had to do over the time since the 'big Cyclone'. I later learnt that a butterfly must struggle out of its chrysalis to start the blood to flow into its wings to make it strong and able to fly. It must do this to complete its life cycle into a butterfly. I felt I wanted to help the struggling butterfly but by assisting the butterfly and helping it to free itself, I would never let it fully develop and fulfill its destiny. I would actually be hindering it and prevented it from becoming who it was meant to be. What God showed me was that what He does, sometimes in our lives, is to allow the struggle, the hurt, the process because we must fight to become fully who we are meant to be.

If He stepped in to help during the most crucial part in our lives, we would never become who we were made to be. As I pondered this thought out came the butterfly, flying away . with Puppy in the chase, she chased that butterfly all around the field until she eventually fell into the ditch which was filled with muddy water, you should have seen her she changed from a white puppy to a brown dog! "That's it Puppy you are going to have a bath even you will become a new creation!"

The Bible says, "if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" When we invite Jesus to come into our heart, we become a new creation. God doesn't just clean us up, He makes us into a new person.

So now when I find myself in a huge struggle or fight I can have hope. I now understand that this could be in the most important part of my life that will make me into who I am destined to be. I know that Jesus is with me and what I am to become is so great that all I have been through and am going though will pave the way for what I am to become. Strong, free, and soaring high with beautiful, colorful butterfly wings to carry me onto the next adventure of life with Puppy.

When they arrived I was given a brand new skateboard and not only that but all the protective gear needed to keep me safe.

They told me the first thing was to make sure I had the right kind of shoes. I know you wouldn't go skating in a pair of cowboy boots, would you? Your shoes should have a flat bottom to help you get a better grip on the board. Next, I was told every skateboarder should wear a helmet. You might think that wearing a helmet makes you look like a dork, but, believe me, it is the smart thing to do. Another thing you will need is pads. It is important to have pads to protect your elbows and knees. Now that I had all the right gear, it is time to go skateboarding. Even professional skateboarders make sure they have the right protective equipment.

Just as we need protective gear in skateboarding, the Bible teaches us that we need protection in life. The Bible calls it the armor of God and it tells us that we need the armor of God to protect us from Satan's evil schemes. We were taught this in Sunday School and marched around singing 'I'm in the Lords army' I loved it, Jasmine thought it was for boys only but we got to learn about the armor of God.

The belt of truth - The Bible tells us that Satan is the "father of lies," but he can never win if we will hold on to the truth that Jesus Christ is Lord

The breastplate of righteousness - Satan can never harm us when we choose to do what God says is right

Feet fitted with the gospel of peace - Satan tries to create worry and confusion in our lives, but knowing Jesus brings peace

The shield of faith - Satan will try to plant seeds of doubt in our hearts and minds, but those seeds of doubt can never take root if we have faith in Jesus

The helmet of salvation - Jesus came from heaven to earth to save us from the evil one, if we accept salvation in Jesus' name, we will win the battle against Satan

The sword of the Spirit - the Bible, God's Holy Word, it is a powerful weapon against Satan.

I know no skateboarder should ever get on his board without the proper equipment, and I should never try to go through life without the armor of God.

She told us we had to take our fears and tell them to God. She told us that God always listens to us and that one of the special powers is prayer and that this is like a private phone to God. She said this private phone is only connected to God. He must have millions of ears to hear everyone at the same time. She said that fears and nightmares are like ropes that tie us and that God can cut them if we ask him in Jesus name. (We all made cell phones out of cereal packets and started talking to God!

Then she said that hating people was the opposite of what God wanted us to do. She told us it was hard to have love for God in your heart if your heart was filled with hate. She told us we could open the tap of our heart and say we are sorry and let the hate run out. She said this is called repentance.

She told us a neat story about a woman who did some bad things in her life. She didn't say what they were but we know that she was very, very sorry. She felt so bad in fact, that she went to see Jesus in someone's house-when she wasn't even invited!! She didn't know anyone, the people in the house didn't want her there but she was meeting Jesus! I imagine she must have felt very scared and very little. I don't mean little like she was tiny, I mean little like she was with people who were very important. She probably felt UNimportant. Not only did she go, but she knelt down behind Jesus and washed his feet WITH HER TEARS! Then she washed them with perfume. You can imagine how the other people in the house felt. One of them got upset with her and with Jesus! Simon the Pharisee didn't think Jesus should be letting her do that. But Jesus not only let her do it, he told her that her sins-all the bad things we do in our life-were forgiven. She was able to leave with a happy and peaceful heart. There were so many lessons to be learned from this story, firstly the woman did something wrong and wanted to make it right. I could think of lots of things I had said and done that I wish I could now make right. Jasmine told me this is what Jesus wants me to do. If we do something wrong, what could we do to make it right? What are some things we could do to make it better?

The other thing we need to get from this story is how Jesus reacted. Did Jesus throw the woman out? Did he say-"you did something wrong, leave me alone?" What did Jesus do? He let her stay, he let her ask for forgiveness, and then he forgave her. It's important for us to do the same. I decided to give it a try. After all, what had I got to lose except horrible dreams, bad feelings and loneliness? I gave God my fears, my memories of that scary storm, the sadness and the loneliness. Then I gave God the anger and the hate. It wasn't easy but I chose to stop hating and to forgive those mean kids and even Pit.

Then I remembered Mr. Hamza and his threats to hurt Puppy and I thought of him in the State Prison and I even decided not to be angry with him any more too. I was free at last, free to forgive.

But I had to learn how to say I'm sorry, how to apologies and really mean it even to someone like Boer , because up until now I was glad I had punched him on the nose. Then I learnt three things needed for a successful apology :

3) Recompense: This is when you try to make amends, which is not always possible, but always worth a try.

I knew "I'm sorry" means nothing unless it comes from a repentant heart. So I first had to ask God to forgive me for being so nasty to Boer .

I had read in Efésios 4:32 Em vez disso, sejam bondosos e tenham compaixão uns dos outros, perdo.

So I had no choice but to go and find Pit and tell him how sorry I was for punching him in the nose. "I'm sorry Boer . I blew it. I was wrong, please forgive me Boer ." Guess what Boer put his hand out and we shook hands, it was the beginning of the healing that was so needed

I felt better after unpacking all those super powers but I was still lonely...... That night I dreamed of my Dad. He was looking for me in the mud, and all the nightmares and fears of that terrible night came flooding back, but then, in my dream Jesus came walking into my room and turned on the light and I wasn't afraid any more and Jesus took my hand and led me outside. There was dad and he and I and Puppy started playing on a lovely green lawn outside of a beautiful new house, it was a good dream and I woke up feeling good inside.

They told me that the Police said that they did not find my Mum and them and that the house went in the sea. I kept hoping it wasn't true. They said they would try to find my Dad.

Then one day Miss Gizela came into school and said I had to come now, now, now! I was worried that maybe something had happened to Puppy or that she had escaped and chewed up someone's shoes. It would not be the first time. She said no, I had a visitor. I went into the office and there was a very dirty tired looking man with a beard. It was ......my Dad.....He held his arms out and we just hugged and hugged. He said he was sorry, that he had only just found out where I was as he had been told I was lost with my Mum and Leila and Uncle Camilo. He had walked for days to get from the other side of the island to get to our village. He said that people said that the whole family was lost. Then he met that Policeman from the first day and he told him I was alive and in the Home. As I listened, I realised that it was true my Mum was actually gone in the storm, and Aunty Leila and Uncle Camilo, I cried and cried and cried and then Miss Gizela suggested I take my Dad to meet Puppy .

When we sat under the house my Dad gave me a special present, all wrapped up, a Teddy Bear toy, soft and squidgy, little did I know how precious 'Teddy' would become to me.

Dad told me that he had been so sad when he thought that I was gone and that seeing me today was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He told me that he was so sorry that he had not come before. He asked me to forgive him for not being there. Dad said our lives may have taken some strange twists and turns but the One who holds our tomorrows is still in control. It kind of reminded me of the story of Joseph in the Bible. Dad said that he had asked God to help him find me and now that he had, we would serve God together for the rest of our lives. " And Puppy" I said

He taught me about Moringa and we planted it all around our property and all the animals ate it and started to get fat. We even drank the tea and began to feel stronger and healthier.

Sometimes we would all go down to the river to play. Those times I felt most at peace, Puppy would splash around at the edge and try to pick up rocks from the river bed, when she did bubbles would come out of her nose! It looked so funny I would laugh at her.

Dad taught me how to swim in the river, I loved those times with Dad, he made me feel special and it almost made up for not having mum around.

I continued to go to Sunday School and I learnt more about peace. This was a whole new experience for me. I learnt that Jesus said " Deixo-vos a paz, a minha paz vos dou; não vo-la dou como o mundo a dá. Não se turbe o vosso coração, nem se atemorize."

But sometimes at the end of the day, when it was time to turn out the lantern, we still did not have electricity, and go to bed, I wanted to know that I was not alone in the darkness. That is where my toy Teddy Bear came to the rescue.

I shall never forget the day Dad gave me 'Teddy' the day we were united at the Big House and at night Teddy was never very far away. Somehow, the darkness was not so frightening with "Teddy" in the bed with me, and Puppy sleeping at the foot of the bed in his special bed that Dad had built for her.

Our Sunday School teacher told us if we want to know peace, we can only know that peace when we know Jesus, the Prince of Peace. If we don't know Jesus, we can have no peace.

That is how I was at the Big House before Jesus became my best friend and gave me that super power to forgive Boer and even that nasty man that threatened to kill Puppy and did nasty things to my friend Hanifa. I had no peace only fear and anger and loneliness but those days are now way behind me. In another life it seems.

I thought to myself "Adil you have moved on, now I have my Dad and my Heavenly Daddy and Puppy, you have found peace of mind, what more could a boy ask for!"

Dad said that I was growing up, I was very pleased, I pushed my chest out and stuck my chin up in the air and went on tip toe to make myself a little taller. Dad said I was now his big boy, he had my back, he was watching over me.

One day I noticed that Puppy was growing up as well in fact she was getting very fat!

I didn't understand why until she started to pull leaves together and she found some rags in the shed and it seemed she was making a den for herself under the house. Then she lay down and I sat down and watched over her as she gave birth to three beautiful little puppies. They were perfect except their eyes were shut, but Dad explained they were born that way and very soon he was right they opened their eyes and saw me for the first time watching over them.

What 'Fun Fabulous' days we had Puppy and I playing with her new puppies, I just knew I could never be happier than I was those days. Puppy always watched over her puppies, she would pick them up and bring back into the shelter if they wondered off and that is when I began to think that my Heavenly Daddy knows everything that I go through.

There is nothing that happens to me that He doesn't know about. Just like Puppy He is watching over me. When I felt lonely and totally abandoned at the Big House, when everything seems hopeless, I began to realize that even then God knows and God cares. And if I wonder off track a bit, He comes after me just like Puppy rounds up her puppies so my Heavenly Daddy comes after me, gives me a big hug and brings me back into the pack.

Then it all came flooding back, the smell of Pao cooking on the wood-fired ovens, Granny's Pao were always light and fluffy. We would enjoy it most when it is straight out of the oven, warm and delicious. I can smell it now , I can see Granny pottered around the kitchen at the back of our old house that the Storm destroyed, and I can hear her now, singing at the top of her old crackly voice an old song the Missionaries had taught her .

And I wept with joy, I knew my heart was healed and for the first time since that dreadful night I sang out loud